we can't stop here...this is bat country.

more cottage. im boring and have noting to say.

don't say your sorry, sorry means something is wrong...

it was jessie's birthday on the 16th. happy 1/4 century baby. just got back from the cottage. we were there sunday till wednesday. it was cool. we did mushrooms, and insanity followed. we blended the mush up and put it into jell-o. fucking sick.

and so ends the chronicles of chucklenuts and seizure boy...

it was my last day of work yesterday. now i have a week and a alf off before i have to go to calgary and work in the mountains. im not too pumped about this at all. the reason i am going out there to work is to save money for me and hot jess's wedding. i work from august till april...30 days on, 7 off. ouch. i just hope i can get back to see the Mars Volta in september and NIN in november.

in case you have no life...

click here. too fucking wierd.

the horn went beep, beep, beep.

jess and i bought a car today. it's a '99 grand am. there was only one condition we had when looking for a car: a tape deck. "who the fuck cares about a tape deck?" you ask. i-pod owners. why on earth would i give a fuck about a cd player that skips when i gots mah i-pizzle? anyways...that's the only thing new cause i am lame and do nothing. oh, and i like cock.

strongest man ever...me.

jess and i went for this crazy long bike ride today. it took like 400 years(3 hours) and was almost a million miles(10km). clearly i am now the most incredible man in the world. my reward was bubble gum ice cream, which jess bought. cause she's my sugar momma. and im a broke ass bitch/most incredible man in the world.

i pooped a hammer.

jess and i went out for dinner with a couple of friends tonight at earl's(which is a shit restaurant, i should know better) and paid too much for crappy food. the couple we went with are also getting married, so the girls/jess/mel are all "blah blah blah rings" and "blah blah blah flowers" and "tee hee giggle rainbows". me and the other guy/donavan are all " yeah beer" and "chicks car work". however, much to my shame, i drank a girly drink. i had some kinda peach bellina ma-jiggy. it looked like somebady spermed on top of a slurpee. i said this out loud(which i thought was fantastic) but jess slapped me in the arm and rather rudely said "NICK! that's gross. they don't know you that well!". fuck that. that is funny. bitch don't know funny. hell, bitch don't know shit. later, she is going to read this and im going to eat my words. with mustard. and mayonaise.

awww psshaw...

so i went and tried on a tux today, cause dan/jen are getting married soon. it sucked. i had to try on the "house tux", which was super gross. there was yellow sweat stains on the collar, and it reaked of funk. and i had to wear no shirt underneath. i was all like "shit, i just showered". but whateva. yesterday at work, my co-worker/ryan had this crazy ass seizure(?) and passed out/fell down and fucked himself up bad. i was all "holy shit". he was saved. all is good, except co-worker/ryan has a bunk leg. sucks.

mmmmmmmmmmmmuthafucka!!!!!

i went to my mom's in gimli this weekend. it was pretty good, except the town was full of muscle-bound steroid filled asshole jock drunk fuck-heads and their fake titted bitches. i always want to tell them how stupid and plastic they are, but then i realize i will come across as the skinny cocky asshole. so i say nothing and grumble to myself, the bitter fuck that i am. there was also skinny, white, hip/hop gangsta wannabes running around acting all hot shit, yelling stupid douche bag shit. one of said fuck-heads walked by me and hot jess and was all like "oh, she's one of those additude girls", meaning hot jess, who is the sweetest girl you will ever meet, and i was all like "FUCK YOU MAN!", and he didn't say shit. he was with two of his fuck-head buddies trying to be all cool. fucking idiots. but yeah, i really did have a good time.